Love in Silence

I saw the Face of Beauty
then she looked at me.
Oh, how could it be,
that an angel would be with me?

He will just wish in silence, in secret.
He can only deny it.
This man will pray to the sunset.
Hoping to love, no longer to be quiet.

Second Chances

If I've learned anything over the past few weeks is that God loves me more than I could ever comprehend. He gave me a week in paradise with friends that make me feel truly alive. I wish I could go back and relive Kiawah over and over again and maybe even be riskier than I had been. God has blessed me with an abundance of money, family peace, great friends, good grades and most of all, His continual presence. And what have I done to deserve such blessing? I've lacked faith, trust, been a royal pain asking all the time for signs of His Will, cursed (psuedo cussing is exactly the same, it's the attitude, not the words), and envy. God has given me what He's given me, what more can I ask of Him? Novel idea, but I ask God for everything under the sun and some more. I want a girl to love me that probably has a hard time even looking at me and can't accept that God has said NO. Why can't I just be friends? Why do I always want more? I keep thinking "If only I had someone that loved me...that'd be enough", but would it? I already have that person in Jesus Christ and I still search for other fillers in His rightful place. When will I be free and content with my life? This is my 99999999th chance to fix my life and glorify Him. I know that it's possible if I rely on the Holy Spirit, but that's the trick...pray for me.